fearmongering

one of my coworkers was in a super bad car wreck way back before i knew her. unfortunately for her, she still has a lot of back problems and is occasionally stuck in bed for a few days with back spasms and can't turn her head and stuff like that...

she's out right now, in fact, and coincidentally another of my coworkers woke up with a very stiff neck this morning. it got worse throughout the day so she decided to go home.

while discussing her decision with our (supportive) boss, i stopped by and mentioned that i just remembered hearing that having a stiff neck was a symptom of rabies. she believed me for a second and i don't think i've ever seen eyes that big.

laugh out loud.

the pros and cons of electric blankets

electric blankets are great because they make your wife happy and everybody loves a happy wife.

electric blankets suck because they make it so that both sides of the pillow are warm.

hey, guys, remember:

PBS at 3AM

a photo essay...

land of the rising sun

finally, the My First Trip To Japan Post-Infancy post.

first off, that place is nuts. especially tokyo. take every city you've ever been to, amplify them slightly, cram them all together in about a greater-LA-sized area and get rid of 99% of the homeless people: tokyo.



we got to stay with our homeboy joji at his house out in chiba city. he was also kind enough to drive us all over tokyo and nearby environs for the whole trip, joji for president.




View Larger Map

head on over to my incredible flickr set to enjoy some shots and notes from the trip. the funny part is the first day or two were so overwhelming, we kind of forgot to take pictures... check out george's flickr for alternate views of the experience as well.

tokyo is amazing and i can't wait to go back, if you have a job opening in tokyo, hire me! nihongo wo benkyō suru totemo hayaku!

F for effort

it would be awesome to be damien hirst. he gets to basically fart in the general direction of a product and the streetwear scene eats it up like crack-dusted dibs... seriously, polka dots? that get bigger? i'd love to meet the moron that buys the whole set because it's EXCLUSIVE! LIMITED! SUPREME! COLLAB!



believe me, i love most of his actual art, but this kind of crap is OBEY-level boring.

finally, hawaii

jet lag from japan got me up reeeeeaaal early this morning, so i decided to kill time by posting pictures from the trip to hawaii. check it all out at flickr and preview a few of my favorites below...

in japan

posting this from the back seat of my friend joji's car, using his 3G USB modem in my laptop. i also have my laptop set up as a wifi hotspot so george and steph can use their iphones... i love living in the future.

check my twitter for trip updates, it's just easier to post there.

tokyo is the most intense place i've ever been, it rrrreeeeeaaaaally helps having a friend who lives here to show us around. konbanwa, americajin!

best truck ever?

yes, yes it is.

subaru impreza review

RETURN OF RENTAL CAR REVIEW!!!

for a rental car, you could do worse.

sure, every. single. thing. inside is plastic BUT it's a fairly nice grade of plastic, not completely offensive to the touch. the engine, sans turbo, still had enough guts that i didn't feel like an idiot trying to merge on to the freeway. the design of the body and interior are super boring. so boring that i didn't even notice it had a sunroof until i was buying gas on the way to return it. i don't really have anything else to say, it was neither awesome nor crap enough to incite florid witticisms.

in summary, all you can ever hope for in a rental car: 3 out of 5 stars.

sky mall

something fishy...

walked in to the susquehanna club in MDT, fox news on the tv and they're reporting about iWatch: a program in LA that recommends if you notice something out of place in your daily routine, report it as it may be terror-related. well, this was waaaaaay out of place for me...









for goodness' sake, click on the photos and go to my flickr, i can't stand how much compression blogger is doing to these images...

janitor art

undercover

as i was heading out to grab a coffee this morning, i ran into one of the mail room guys:

Mail Room Guy: hey, matt, i got a package for you, want me to leave it at your desk?

me: oh, yeah, that'd be awesome, thanks!

MRG: cool, i'll drop it off.

me: sweet, thanks. (i turn to head out the door.)

MRG: hey, matt, one of my coworkers, he thinks you're (indistinguishable).

me: (walking back) huh?

MRG: he thinks you're a cop!

me: what?!

MRG: yeah, he sees you walkin' in the alley and he says "that guy's a cop."

me: no way! that's so funny!

MRG: yeah, he say "that guy dress like a cop..." he think you're police.

me: (laughing) oh man, that's awesome! well, tell him i AM a cop and i got my eye on him...

MRG: (laughing) ok!

go home, becks

i can't tell you how happy it makes me that the galaxy (may they forever lose to the quakes) fans are consistently booing david beckham since his return from europe. no matter what he says in the media, it was a wholly self-serving decision to play for milan and a huge "F you" to the LA fans. it's about time american soccer fans stood up for themselves and demanded some level of quality from the clubs and players they support.

bug flight patterns

flight patterns from Charlie McCarthy on Vimeo.

via designboom

comic review

top 10 vol. 1



writing:
it's written by alan moore. for the unitiated, this means that any random page torn from the book is better-written than the entirety of the twilight series.

art:
outstanding. i think this is my first exposure to gene ha and i really dig his style. he throws in great details, like a tiny, fat, bikini-clad woman amidst the throng running in terror from a giant, drunk monster named gograh who is wearing a "no fat chicks" t-shirt.

conclusion:
buy it. unless you are an idiot, lack a sense of humor or are afraid of ultramice.

found it!

totally biting jarrett's style: what search terms were people using when they found my weblog in the last ten days?

mazda 5 review
dumb safety
party people is the place to be
corporate town hall q&a
gentleman's latte
mazda 5 dumb
mazda 5 rentals
rent mazda 5
mazda 5 review
jarrett reynolds nike
party people and the place to be
(blank search field but came from google, stealth AT&T bot?)
party people in the place to be zack miri
beware the birchmen

i don't think i'll ever be allowed to set foot in a mazda dealership...

still hate AT&T?

...me too!

hate AT&T?

...you're not alone. that a company that large, when gifted with the best-selling mobile phone in history by their competition, can turn around and completely fail to support it and then continually commit customer-service suicide is unfathomable.

this techcrunch post hits every point of frustration for iphone owners (and, thanks to the halo effect, every other smartphone owner on their network) perfectly. i can attest to their many failures as there is a one-block dead zone outside my office in san francisco and i just did a complete restore on stephanie's iphone because she was only receiving texts and voicemails intermittently. it would have been nice if at&t had sent out some sort of notification that, in fact, their VM system was crapping out. no, wait... it would have been the MINIMUM LEVEL OF SERVICE EXPECTED. read the post, compare it to your own experience on AT&T and seriously consider this:

The iPhone will eventually be on Verizon, on Apple’s terms. It’s just a question of when.

If that’s by the end of next year, many of us will be happy campers. I don’t care what I have to pay to break an AT&T contract, I will do so in a heartbeat.

amen.

always be prepared

my biggest frustration with having a broken toe (or any other injury) comes from the negative impact it has on my ability to respond in a fight-or-flight situation. on a normal day, i am constantly judging my situation for vulnerability, defensibility and escapability in case of unforeseen danger. y'know, stuff like someone losing control of their vehicle nearby. or someone having a psychotic episode and deciding to make use of that 8" chef's knife in their bag. or terrorists launching a coordinated attack on the building i'm passing. or the violent genesis of the inevitable robot uprising. or the invasion of earth by extra-terrestrials. or armageddon...

seriously, i totally think like this on my way to work and stuff, but i digress. the point is, it's way harder to attack an opponent or flee nuclear death raining down from on high when you're stuck limping around. this frame of mind also informs my manner of dress: backpacks, rather than shoulder bags, because they're more stable while running and can't be ripped off my person as easily; shoes that i can immediately start running in; just the basics in my pockets so i won't be weighed-down. i'm always shocked at the sight of people carrying a ton of useless crap that they'll obviously have to ditch when the zombie apocalypse begins.

this, of course, brings us to flip-flops. what on earth goes through your head while you're making the decision to wear those stupid things? "it sure is sunny today, i'd better put on some footwear that will assault the visual and olfactory senses of everyone around me, insure i couldn't run away from a slow loris on valium and drastically increase my chances of getting huge, infected cuts on my feet and/or broken toes!" perfect. me? i'm gonna put on my nikes and leave you and your tanned feet in the dust when the ninjas start jumping out of the trees...

how to celebrate jonathan lawrence whitmire's birthday

just in case you missed the tweets or facebook posts, there's a video recap of jon whitmire's birthday shenanigans in the bay area over at my mobileme gallery (not embedded here because mobileme doesn't allow that, flickr won't take files that big, youtube is all scared of copyright infringement and i'm waaaaaay too lazy to set up a real blog on my own site with real hosting). it was shot entirely on iPhones 3GS, many thanks to melina juarez for sharing her footage.

this movie is rated PG-13 for tattoos, language, alcohol consumption and comic violence.

UPDATE: now available with less tattoo footage, thanks to viewer feedback.

fastest wedding ever?

the 4th of july weekend was mental. tattoos, a birthday AND a wedding. bill and whitney got married under the crocker crypt at the mountain view cemetery in oakland. their buddy mark, ordained by the church of the latter-day dude, opened with some lovely words and then guided the happy couple through a one minute vow exchange. we drank prosecco, popped party poppers and wrapped things up hastily when security started poking around. definitely the least traditional and one of the sweetest weddings i've ever been to...

the groom

via leigh's flickr

gundam, go!

whoops

this morning i had the bizarre experience of jumping out of bed to turn off the alarm and promptly falling flat on my face. apparently, my left leg was still "asleep" and not responding to commands from my brain.

it was, however, dutifully sending pain signals TO my brain, all of which were originating in my little toe. i had hoped that it was simply sprained but it is now huge and purple - the hallmarks of a broken toe. moral of the story? take your time getting out of bed...

like my foot wasn't gross enough to begin with...

inked

i learned two things this weekend:

1: it is customary to tip your tattoo artist.

2: getting sweat on a fresh tattoo hurts.

jon, george and i had talked about getting tattoos of futura 2000's gear designs way back in college. that idea, like many hatched in college, fell by the wayside as "life" continued. recently, jon had revived the subject with george and george mentioned as much to me. i enthusiastically expressed my support for the endeavor and we concocted a plan to surprise jon while visiting for his birthday on the 4th of july. of course, the design had to be agreed upon first, so george developed a clever ruse involving us planning to have it done in san diego during comic-con later this month.

the ruse worked, jon was surprised and we all made permanent changes to our impermanent bodies.

fail

UPDATE: in fairness to apple and at&t, i think i can pin the failed-sync blame squarely on nikeplus.com, as they are in the middle of rolling out an updated website and service. the feature set is more compelling and the design is far better, so i'll take a couple lost miles in the name of progress.

UPDATE 2: well, it appears apple and nike may be culpable after all. my latest (and longest with the 3GS) run just failed to upload to nikeplus.com AND THEN somehow managed to disappear out of the history list on my iphone... of course, angry emails have been sent and snarky forum posts have been made, but they need to fix this fast. why on earth can't a device as advanced as the latest iphone pull off a feat that is constantly accomplished by my three-year-old ipod nano? and if i'm FORCED to pay for UNLIMITED DATA by at&t, why can't i upload my run history directly from the phone? ridiculous...

memories...

back in 1999, when i began my employment at the venerable Williams-Sonoma, Inc., all catalog photography was shot on large and medium format film. 'round about 2001, we started the transition to digital photography. a day's shoot would be delivered to us as a big ol' stack of iomega zip disks.



zips held a whopping ONE HUNDRED MEGABYTES for about ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS. they were a big deal because they were SO SMALL (about 3.5" square). in college, we had just started using 150MB bernoulli disks (also about $100) for digital projects but they were HUGE in comparison (about 5" square). here's a 100MB bernoulli drive next to my old 16 GIGABYTE iphone:



oh, by the way, the iphone makes calls and surfs the web and plays movies and stuff. hilarious. since 2001, we've gotten photo in on a bunch of different kinds of storage media/devices: CDs, DVDs, portable hard drives... but last week we got a batch on something new, a USB thumb drive. not just any thumb drive, a TWO GIGABYTE MICRO VAULT TINY!



it holds as much data as 20 zip disks, is small enough to swallow, costs about $20 and comes with a cute sleeve you can clip to your shirt or cell phone or something:



i can't wait 'til the photographer just IMs the photo straight to my cell phone. which will be embedded in my eyeglasses. eyephone. ha.