more airport

last one was san diyucko (just kidding, i love that place, that just sounds funny) now i'm in ORD awaiting a delayed flight to MKE. i decided to get a mcflurry because i don't feel fat enough and as i was waiting i watched a man tempt fate to a degree i had heretofore never witnessed. he asked the young, female, african-american, chicagoan cashier for five dollars of his change in quarters. "in quarters?" was her reply, coupled with a look that would split the atom if he hadn't absorbed the full force.

needless to say, everyone in line after him approached her with the proper etiquette and all humility.

on my way back to find a seat, a fat business guy in his casual j. crew travel ensemble, wiping his brow with a camouflage handkerchief passed me by, muttering "six o-f@#kin-clock..."

at least i get to keep the miles.

nerd alert!

weblogging from the airport... what unspeakable horrors will i encounter as i sink ever deeper through these increasingly heinous levels of dork hell?

the kid across from me just asked who was going to sit next to him and his entire family looked at him like he was covered in disease. poor guy. he's got a sweet new skate setup though, so that should help him escape the family dysfunction i'm imagining and provide a focus for the impending chaos of jr. high life...

in closing, her scrimshaw brings all the boys to the yard.

hd

i've got a high definition television and i absolutely love playing video games on it, however the next wave of HD tech seems intent on screwing the living hee-haw out of the people who are supposed to be buying it... do yourself a favor and get educated before diving into this stuff, pay attention to what the big corporations are doing to take your money and then CONTROL the way you use the technology YOU BOUGHT inside YOUR OWN HOME and then take a moment to speak out against this thinly veiled tyranny.

honestly, if it doesn't piss you off, you probably live in a yurt.

where's waldo?

toomuchcoffeeman

coffee was a bad choice this morning. i didn't sleep well last night, so that's +7 edgy guy to start the day. then we have +11 excitement upon learning i can take monday off and get a cheap flight to san diago this weekend. factor in -5 happiness when i discover i will miss a mt. st. mtn. record release party and arm wrestling tournament. so far we're in an above average positive range for a tuesday morning in a cubicle...

then i drank some peet's coffee, instantly +37 mental acuity, thereby initiating dangerously high levels of brainwave activity, resulting in a nearly hallucinogenic degree of multi-MF-tasking.

EXPOSÉ!

outside passes r teh r0xx0rz

during 76.540936% of my waking life the only sport i care to watch is soccer. another 21.872197% of my sports enthusiasm is devoted to the oakland athletics major league baseball team. that leaves me with 1.586867% of fanatic fervor to expend on other sporting events.

surprisingly (to myself) i am currently absolutely enthralled by olympic short track speed skating. it's just ridiculous. i get all fired up when the race starts to get hectic – adrenaline pumping, heart rate increasing, sweat beading, throat drying, pupils probably dilating... and then the american racer loses.

i hope they show a lot of table tennis during the summer olympics.

happy st. valentine's day

love song.


thank you for enjoying this very special holiday weblog post.

civilized conversation

bow down

all contemporary country musicians should commit ritual suicide in deference to this song.

bright plastic mystery

i just got back from lunch to find these strange creatures roaming the barren wasteland of my desk:

gaze in wonder at their tiny polypropylene splendor!

pummeled

eight times out of 10 when i pick up an odd-shaped, heavy object i immediately imagine how it would feel to hammer someone nearby in the face or head with it. the momentum of the swing, the sickly crunch of the impact and the fear, adrenaline, etc. that would follow. i'm sure loads of people would link this to my affinity for video-gaming, but i would counter with my memories of imagining ultraviolence as a child long before i'd ever played super mario bros... myself falling out of moving cars, bookcases falling on classmates, various lacerations and mutilations in restaurants and school cafeterias.

mmmmmm, yes... an overactive imagination is a kid's best friend. the kind of friend that occasionally pushes you down the stairs and says it was an accident, but a friend that's always there for you, nonetheless.

skies

i love my phone.