dunkin'

i reeeeeaaaaaally wish we had dunkin' donuts in the bay area. sure, the donuts are great, blah blah blah, but it's the coffee that turns my frown upside-down. i think when you order your coffee "with milk and sugar," that's secret code to "sprinkle a little crack dust on it."

i've never been so happy for a buck sixty nine...

undercover

as i was heading out to grab a coffee this morning, i ran into one of the mail room guys:

Mail Room Guy: hey, matt, i got a package for you, want me to leave it at your desk?

me: oh, yeah, that'd be awesome, thanks!

MRG: cool, i'll drop it off.

me: sweet, thanks. (i turn to head out the door.)

MRG: hey, matt, one of my coworkers, he thinks you're (indistinguishable).

me: (walking back) huh?

MRG: he thinks you're a cop!

me: what?!

MRG: yeah, he sees you walkin' in the alley and he says "that guy's a cop."

me: no way! that's so funny!

MRG: yeah, he say "that guy dress like a cop..." he think you're police.

me: (laughing) oh man, that's awesome! well, tell him i AM a cop and i got my eye on him...

MRG: (laughing) ok!

for people who like to pee

i just heard the dumbest coffee order in human history: venti triple decaf soy latte. did you catch that? triple DECAF? basically, they just ordered a really big cup full of bitter soy milk. talk about unnecessary calories...

btw, decaf is really bad for you.